Having the right goals is vital for achieving success in your life. 

But how do you know what the right goals are?

In this episode I give you a simple yet powerful “AAA formula” to find the goals that are right for you and that will give you the greatest success in your life. 

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You might recall that in the last episode we looked at the way to guarantee that you achieve your goals 100% of the time. 

And we saw that the way to do that is to make sure you set the right goal.

Because when you set the right goal, you activate the Creative Part of your brain. 

This is the part that does all of the “work” in giving you everything you really want in your life, and ensuring that you live your life purpose, you not only survive but you thrive, and you be the best you can be, the strongest, healthiest, most creative, most resourceful and - most importantly of all - your happiest.

Your Creative Brain knows what is best for you. 

Therefore it knows what the right goals for you are. 

And your Creative Brain communicates to you what these right goals are through your intuition, and your feelings. 

Not through your thoughts. 

Your thoughts come from your Thinking Brain, which is very limited. 

This is why trying to “think your way” through setting and achieving your goals rarely works. 

Using only your Thinking Brain causes you to set the wrong goals and that is what causes struggle and problems in your life.


As I’ve repeated many times in previous episodes of Using Your Brain for Success, being your happiest - with few or no problems to deal with  - is what you’re here to be. 

The happier you are the more contribution you are going to be able to make, not only to your own life, but to the lives of others. 

So it really is your biological purpose to be happy.

And of course when it comes to having problems in your life - well problems don’t do anything to help you to be happy, do they? 

They do the opposite - problems make you not only unhappy, but they weaken you and actually reduce your ability to survive.

So from a purely natural, biological point of view, there is no place for problems in your life. 

Problems are not a part of the natural world, and they only arise as a result of using your survival machine - your brain - the wrong way. 

Problems are a sign you’re doing something wrong - and they are there to alert you to the fact that you ARE operating in the wrong way, 

They’re a warning signal to you that you need to make some changes to your life. 

And you can only do that when you make changes to the way you are using your brain.


So we’ve established that the only way to guarantee you achieve your goals - and to ensure you have a happy, successful life, being who you are here to be - is to set the right goals.


But how do you do that? 

How do you set the right goals? 

How do you know what the right goals really are? 

Well that’s what we’re going to discuss in this episode. 

And I’m going to give you a 3-step formula that I use that is very effective in showing you what your right goals are and how to achieve them without struggle or frustration.


Learning how to find and set the right goals is really the “missing link” in the whole area of goal setting. 

For years I studied and tried to apply goal setting to my life, in an effort to be “more successful”. 

So I read books, went to seminars, listened to gurus, studied and applied goal-setting techniques, strategies and methods, but when I finally accepted the truth  that goal-setting, the way I had been led to understand it - wasn’t really working for me, I realised that this was what was missing. 

Every book, method and teaching seemed to gloss over the question of how to find the right goal. 

They all said, 

“Just pick a goal and do this, this and this to reach it.”

But there was very little if any direction on HOW to pick a goal. 

I was led to believe that you can pick just any goal. 

It doesn’t matter if it is unrealistic or even unsuitable for you - whatever you want (or think you want or say you want) you can have it. 

You just need to do x, y and z and you’ll get it.

But the more I was honest with myself in observing the results I was getting - and the results I saw other people getting - I realised that this simply isn’t true. 

Hoping, wishing, praying, trying hard or using a technique such as repeating your goal over and over in what’s called an “affirmation” or visualising yourself with the goal, or trying some form of hypnosis, “reprogramming your subconscious mind” positive thinking - all of these things just simply don’t work. 

Because as I found, you can’t force your brain to bring you something. 

And in fact, if you try to force anything, the results are simply going to be more of what you don’t want - stress, fear, anxiety, worry - and lots of problems and frustration in your life. 

Force is not true power. 

Force is when you push against your true self. 

Power is when you harness your true self.


However, there was something else that I realised when I started to analyse the truth about goals and the role they play in our life.

And that is - that when it is the right goal, you achieve it. 

And not only do you get what you’re wanting, but you do it in a way that doesn’t involve struggle. 

Yes it requires effort, but it’s an effort that you willingly - rather than unwillingly - put in. 

And things flow when you’re on the path to achieving the right goal. 

Good things happen and people and situations “show up” to help you rather than hinder you. 

It’s a completely different experience working towards the right goal. 

It’s as if you’re being guided and helped to achieve it. 

This is when you’re working with yourself, with your power rather than trying to force.


Think of something significant that you’ve achieved in your life and ask yourself, 

Isn’t this true? 

Wasn’t achieving that goal somehow a lot easier and more pleasurable than trying to reach other goals? 

Somehow it “felt right” didn’t it? 

Of course, it probably took a lot of effort and not everything went according to plan. 

But when you look back on it you realise that all of the right things happened at the right time for you to achieve the goal. 


This is why setting the right goal is so important. 

You need to be working towards the things that truly are going to make you happy in your life, not the things that you think will. 

You know, most people set a goal by saying to themselves:

“What do I want? 

Well I’m not happy right now, so I really want something that is going to take away the pain, fear or frustration I’m experiencing.” 

And they take a stab in the dark and come up with something like:

“I want ten million dollars”, or 

“I want my husband or wife to love me again”, or 

“I want my children to stop arguing with me”, or 

“I want this job”, or 

“I want my business to do x”.


But none of these things might be right for you or even realistic. 

And if they’re not right for you then they are NOT realistic.

It used to really puzzle me - and even upset me slightly - when I would go to seminars and people would stand up and say - either to the whole group or to some of the group:

“My goal is to be a millionaire and I’m going to achieve it”. 

I could just feel that it wasn’t right for them - being a millionaire just didn’t seem to fit with who this person seemed to be. 

And, deep down, if I was honest, and if they were honest with themselves, it was obvious this wasn’t the right goal for them. 

It’s not to say that being a millionaire isn’t the right goal for some people - of course it is. 

But for many of the people who have this goal, it’s simply not in harmony to have this as an objective.

And of course they won’t ever achieve it, no matter how hard they try.


But at the seminar, when someone announced to the group this was their goal - to be a millionaire - well of course we all clapped and cheered and gave them encouragement. 

But the reality is, of course, that if you were to check in with that person a year or even five years later, you would find that they were no closer to reaching that goal. 

I found this for myself time and time again. 

I would read a book, watch a motivational video or go to a seminar to “learn how to be successful”, and get all pumped up with motivation, excitement and determination. 

I’d set a big goal and promise myself I would achieve it. 

I would say:


“I am 100% committed to achieving this goal.” 

“I will defy the odds.”

“I will do whatever it takes and I WILL achieve this.”


And I’d put down the book or go home after the seminar and I really was motivated and determined. 

I would take massive action. 

I’d do all of the things I said I would. 

But I still didn’t reach the goal. 

I’d struggle with problems and disappointments. 

Things just didn’t go to plan. and, again being honest, not long into the process I would start to doubt whether this really was the right goal to have anyway.

And of course, like others I knew, I simply never achieved those goals.


Setting the wrong goals isn’t just a waste of time and energy it’s actually destructive. 

It can be disastrous going after a goal when you haven’t established that it’s the right one. 

And this isn’t just true of individuals. 

It can be the goals of businesses and even entire nations. 

Look at  dictators throughout history for example and the destruction and misery they have caused in their goals of  impose their ideology on an entire nation or even of conquering the world.

This also happens in the corporate world. 

Many businesses have been harmed and even destroyed - and may people hurt, including their management, shareholders, employees and even their customers - by setting the wrong goals.

An example is the Ford Motor Company. 

In the late 1960s the CEO, Lee Iacocca set a goal for the company to produce a new car that weighed less than 2000 pounds and cost under $2000 and to have it ready for sale by the end of the decade, in 1970. 

Now this was a huge challenge for the company and really something that was quite unrealistic. 

But in an attempt to reach the goal the company cut all sorts of corners. 

Worst of all, executives found a fault with the car which was a major safety hazard, but they covered it up. 

Because to report and try to rectify it would have meant the goal would not have been reached. 

The result was that the new car, the Ford Pinto, caused 53 deaths and many more injuries due to fires that were the result of this faulty design. 

This not only created tragedy for the people killed or injured, but it also harmed the company, with numerous lawsuits and of course a huge dent in their reputation and subsequent drop in sales. 

And all because the company had simply set the wrong goal.


So how do you set the right goals? 

How do you know if the goals are the right ones? 

Well one of the problems with setting any goal - and in knowing whether it is the right one or not - is that you don’t have, and you can never have,  enough information

You don’t know what is going to happen - in your life and in your world - that is going to affect your decision to achieve your goal - moving forward. 

So even if something appears to be the right goal  right now, subsequent events and circumstances might show that it’s not the right goal, or at least might have been the right goal at one point but is no longer right.

So this is why trying to gather information and trying to work out logically whether you have the right goal never works. 

You can’t rely on information - because information constantly. changes. 

You’re always getting more information.

So trying to “figure out” what your goal should be - which comes from using your Thinking Brain - simply won’t work. 

And it’s the real reason why - for most people - most of their goals don’t work. 

They’re trying to figure their goals out. 

So if you can’t “figure out” and “work on” finding the right goals, how do you do it?

There is a better way - and the only effective way.

And I’ve condensed this way into a simply process which I call the Triple A Formula for Setting the Right Goal

I’ll share it with you shortly, but before I do, a word about your brain, and how using it the right way is the key to choosing and achieving the right goals.

You’ll know from previous episodes that your brain produces two emotional “brain states”, both designed to ensure you survive and thrive and achieve your life purpose. 

The first - and the one which should be your predominant state - is your Natural Creative State

This is where you activate your Creative Brain, where everything in both your mind and your body is functioning at its best. 

You’re being your strongest, healthiest, most resourceful, most creative and most aware  - and you are feeling your best. 

This means being happy - in the flow of your life and allowing your brain to use its infinite power to bring you everything you need and want. 

This is the state in which you’re living your true life purpose.


And if for some reason a danger or threat to your survival should come across your path, then your brain has a “defence mechanism” to protect you.

This  comes from being in your other emotional state, your Survival State, where your brain ensures that by “fight, flight or freeze” you react without thinking - but from instinct instead - to remove that danger or threat, so that you can get back to thriving and being your best.


The way your brain operates to produce either of these two states for you means one important thing in the context of setting goals.


And that is - If you want to know what the right goal is - and if you want to achieve it - you can only do that when you are in your Natural Creative State. 

You can only find the right goals to go after when you are using your brain’s full creative and thinking resources. 

And that means, you can only ever find the right goal when you are in a state of happiness, peace, faith, trust, joy and love. 

You can never find the right goal when you are stressed, worried, frustrated or afraid, because when you do that you block your brain’s full resources. 

We’ve explained how and why this works at length in previous episodes.

So how do you do that? 

How do you make sure you’re in the right emotional state - that you’re feeling good - when you want to set or achieve a goal to make sure it’s going to be the right one for you?

After all, you might be surrounded by problems in your life, things that are causing you major stress. 

But the real irony of how your brain works is that you simply cannot solve your problems - or even set the right goals let alone achieve them - if you are in a stressed state. 

It’s simply not how your brain functions. 

And all of the will-power, determination, prayer, action, hard work and positive thinking is not going to change that.

You simply must be in the right brain state, free of worry and stress, if you’re going to have any chance of really solving your problems and setting and achieving the right goals.

The most effective way I know to do this is to use Neuro-State Rebalancing. 

NSR automatically puts your brain into the right state so that you not only see clearly what the right goal for you is, but you also see clearly what you need to do to achieve it, and you get “in the flow” of achievement so that the results come to you without struggle or problems. 

With NSR you have a sense of certainty about your life that is both exciting and empowering and you achieve everything you really want. 

You can find out more about NSR on my website liamnaden.com.


But here’s a simple yet powerful formula that you can use to immediately start to make goal setting work for you in your life. 

This formula, when you apply it the right way, will ensure you only set the right goals - and stop setting the wrong goals - so that working towards goals, and living your life, becomes enjoyable rather than a struggle.

There are 3 steps to the formula and they all begin with A, which is why I call it:


The Triple A Formula for Setting the Right Goal.


The first step - the first A - is to Allow.


You have to Allow the right goal to show up - and at the right time. 

You can’t force it. 

Remember force comes from the Survival “fight, flight or freeze” brain. 

True power - which never involves force - comes from your Creative Brain.

That means no struggle with trying to think what your goals should be, or how to achieve them. 

You simply Allow the goal to come into your conscious mind when it’s ready. 

So it also means not getting frustrated if you don’t know what your goal is. 

Remember, frustration blocks the part of your brain that has the answer - your Creative Brain.

So simply allow the right goal to come to you at the right time. 

And if you don’t know what it is yet, just relax and know it’s on the way. 

It will show up at exactly the right time for you.

Many people - and I used to be one of them - try to force themselves to find a goal. 

And they become so frustrated when the “right goal” doesn’t show up, that they pick any goal using their “logical Thinking Brain”. And it makes them feel a bit better - because after all, having any goal is better than no goal at all, right? 

Well it is - but only when you are in Survival State. 

I explained the Survival Brain’s need for certainty in previous episodes.


Because the truth is,  it is far better to have no goal at all than to have the wrong goal. 

If you have the wrong goal you’re simply going to spend your time - and your life, struggling to get something, with all of the problems it’s going to bring you along the way - that wouldn’t make you happy even in you got it. 

And think of how many times you set a goal or made a decision that was the wrong one - and what huge negative consequences it had. 

How much time did you have  to spend “undoing” or trying to fix problems created for you simply because you made a wrong decision in the first place?


So be prepared - and willing - not to have any goals at all. 

Just relax, keep yourself in your Natural Creative State, which means feeling good - and the right goal will show up at the right time. 

Guaranteed!


The second part of the formula - the second A - is Accept

When the right goal comes to you awareness - and you will know it is the right goal because of how it will make you feel - then you have to Accept it. 

You have to recognise that it is the right goal for you. 

Now it might be something completely new. 

It might be something you have never thought of. 

It might mean you having to completely change your beliefs or your expectations. 

It might mean you have to make some big and possible radical decisions about your life. 

But if it is the right goal - and it will be if you’ve followed step #1 and allowed it to appear while you are in the right brain state - then you must trust that it is what is best for you.

Many people really struggle with this one. 

They won’t accept that the right goal - the real goal - is where they should be putting their focus and effort. 

And it’s because they are using their brain incorrectly and they’re in a state of fear. 

When you’re in a state of fear, your Survival Brain will do everything it can to convince you that something that is new or different  is not right for you. 

It will bring to you all sorts of fears, doubts and uncertainties to try to stop you from taking what it sees as a big risk: stepping into the unknown. 

You will find yourself justifying why you shouldn’t accept this goal. 

You’ll think things such as:

“It’s too hard.”

“I’m too old.”

“I’m too young.”

“I might fail.”

“People might ridicule me.” 

“I might hurt other people.” 

And even, 

“I might feel and appear to be a failure because it means I have to give up a goal I already have.”


Or your logical thinking brain might even try to talk you out of it with “logical” arguments.


Your present circumstances can make it appear to be very difficult for you to accept the right goal. 

For example, if you’ve worked very hard for something - if it’s taken a lot of your time and physical and emotional energy to achieve it - it won’t necessarily be easy to let go of it and accept a new right goal if it comes along. 

This often happens to people who stay in a marriage or relationship, or in a job, or a business or part of a business when things are very difficult. 

The right goal might be to move on - to end that relationship, quit that job or get rid of that business. 

The right goal might be to do that - but people find it very hard to do because the future seems so uncertain without it, and they feel that the consequences and risks of changing their goal from “fixing the problem” to simply letting it go might end badly for them.

But the thing is, when you set the right goal and strive to achieve it, things always work out better than you expect.

When you try to achieve the wrong goal, things always work out worse than you expect, both for yourself and for others.

So you need to flexible and open minded - and to have the courage and faith in yourself to Accept the right goal when it becomes presented to you. 

But here’s the thing: 

Accepting the Right Goal will be more difficult than achieving it. 

Once you accept it, you’re 90% on the way there. 


And that only leaves the 3rd and final step, the final A which is Act.

You need to take some action. 

Your right goal is not going to be achieved on its own. 

You need to play your part.

This is also where many people get stuck. 

They know the right goal, they accept that it is the right one - but they don’t take action.

And as a result they become frustrated, confused and stressed - instead of reaching the goal.

But here’s the thing about taking Action. 

You don’t need to know everything that you have to do to achieve your goal. 

You don’t need to know all the steps. 

You don’t need to know how to achieve your goal at all.

You not only don’t need to know any of these things but in fact you can’t know. 

So don’t try to. 

Simply accept that ALL you need to know - the only thing you need to know - is what to do next

You only need to know the next step

Nothing more. 

And once you take that next step, the next one after that will become revealed to you.

This is how your Creative Brain works in ensuring you reach the right goal. 

It’s your Creative Brain that is directing things, and giving you the instructions on reaching your goal. 

It’s as if your Creative Brain is saying to you:

“I’ve found the right goal for you and you’ve accepted it. 

Good. 

Now here’s the next thing you need to do….

Just do this, and when you’ve done it I’ll show you the next step after that.”


If you can Allow the right goal to show up for at the right time, recognise and Accept it is the right goal, with faith which comes from understanding how your brain works, and then Act on the next step, and only the next step - then you will be astounded, not only at how much more you achieve in your life, but at how truly fulfilling your life will be.


You will set - and achieve - the right goals. 

And you’ll also find that you’re going to stop doing many if not all of the wrong things. 

In fact, the only time you’ll get knocked off track and do things that cause you problems, is when you’re acting from fear, stress, frustration and worry rather than following this process of Allowing, Accepting and taking the next step (Acting).

—————————————————

So for now, as you think about what goals you might have for your life, just bring your attention back to the present moment. 

As I’ve said before, the present moment is all there is. 

It’s all you have. 

And it’s also the only time - when you’re in the present moment - that you really are in a state of Allowing, Accepting and taking the right Action.


And as you feel your body and mind relax, just consider this:

How much better would or could your life be if you took the pressure off yourself? 

If instead of trying to “figure out” what to do all the time - what you should do to solve a problem, how to find and achieve the right goals and how to get your life to a place where you were truly happy - 

If instead you were doing what you loved and actually enjoying every moment without constant stress and struggles? 

Wouldn’t that in itself be a great goal to have and achieve?


Well you know, you really can have a life like that. 

It really is possible. 

In fact, it’s not only possible, it’s the way you’re designed to live. 

You’ve been given everything you need to ensure you live your life achieving your highest potential and being the best and happiest you can be.


And it all starts with using your brain the right way.


Make the decision that you’re going to end the struggle in your life, that you’re going to let go and trust that your brain - this incredible machine of virtually infinite power that’s been given to you to serve you and give you what you want and need to be your best.

You’re going to rust that your brain will do the job it’s designed to do if you allow it.

So Allow your brain to find the right goals for you. 

Say to yourself: 

“It’s over to you. 

Find me the right goals and at the right time. 

I know that you will.”


And then wait with a sense of excited expectation. 

The right goal for you is on the way. 

You’re going to discover what it is! 

Isn’t that exciting?

And when the right goal comes into your mind - and it will - Accept it. 

You’ll recognise it when you see it. 

Don’t try to fight against it, deny it, block it out or come up with 100 reasons why it won’t work, why it isn’t right or why you shouldn’t go after it. 

All you’re doing when you do that is fighting against yourself….and you’re simply not going to win the game of life by fighting against yourself. Y

ou have to accept that your infinite Creative Brain knows better than you do, wants the best for you and won’t let you down.

And one of the best ways to stop fighting against it is simply to take an Action. 

Ask: 

“What’s the next step?” 

And whatever answer you get back, take action. 

It could be - and in fact probably will be - something small. 

It could even be to do nothing at all. 

Because if you don’t know what to do, then do nothing at all. I

t’s better than doing the wrong thing, which will be the result if you act out of fear or frustration.

And as you take that small action - or no action at all, whatever feels right - then trust that, if it feels right, then it is the right thing. Don’t worry about making a mistake. 

Things might not turn out the way you expect, but if you Allow rather than force the right goals to come into your awareness, you recognise and Accept them as the right goals, and you take the next step that feels right - you Act - then your life is going to turn out so much better than you ever expected and in ways that will surprise and delight you. 

And you’ll discover who you really are and where your true power lies.

And how the key to all of this is to use your brain the right way.

That’s all for this episode of Using Your Brain for Success. 

 If you’d like to learn more about how to use your brain the right way visit my website liamnaden.com. There you’ll find information about my coaching services and ways I can help you achieve your full potential. There you can also learn about  Neuro-State Rebalancing. This is a powerful process that automatically gets your brain the right way so that you live the inspired and fulfilling life that you are truly designed to live. 

Thanks for listening. I look forward to connecting with you again soon. Bye for now.

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